Foot Fetish

Spending nine hours traveling across the country affords one the opportunity to see a lot of different kinds of people. Doing it in the summertime, thanks to the popularity of sandals and flip-flops, affords one the opportunity to see all kinds of toes. And toe nails.

First of all, let’s all agree that feet are kind of gross (unless you have one of those weird fetishes in which case I don’t even know what to say to you). In general, I believe that God created shoes to hide the unsightly appendages. But people insist on showing theirs. Young women and children, their feet are generally smooth in texture, clean, and the least type of offensive. I saw several of these feet.

Old men feet, though? Nasty. They are often dry and cracked with white flaky callouses visible around the edges. Yuck. Now that I think of it, I saw several older women with the same scaly skin poking out of their sequined studded sandals.

But what’s even grosser than just plain old feet is the toenail. I got a chance to see lots of toenails yesterday. Let’s just say that those images are definitely going to get me through the next diet. Every time I think of eating I will remember the thick, yellowing, flaky nails of the 70 year old, ZZ top style bearded gentleman. Or, I will think of the middle aged woman on the plane whose nails were painted a delicate shade of Moonlight Mauve but were so long they began curling over the edges of her toes. Could you imagine those babies catching your leg while you were trying to spoon in bed?

If you don’t believe me, next time you have some quality people watching time, turn your gaze south or bring a good book instead.

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4 Responses to Foot Fetish

  1. jeandayfriday says:

    Hilarious! Remember a former coworker of ours who would wear hose with sandals and still her feet were crusty beyond crusty? The image makes me run for a pedicure! Stat! 🙂

  2. crubin says:

    And to think some people actually find feet arousing. Ew. I think I’ll keep my eyes Northward. 🙂

  3. Jonesingafter40 says:

    EWWWW! This post was a little too well-written… can’t get the images out of my head!! 😉

  4. bronxboy55 says:

    I’ve always said that most shoes are ugly, but after reading this post I have a new appreciation for footwear.

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